Why do people like the heat?

The high today in Baton Rouge was 40 degrees according to the stupid scale Americans use for temperature (4 Celsius according to every other nation on earth). That was much warmer than it was in Hays, where it was -8 Celsius (17 above on the stupid scale).

COME ON, AMERICA. THE TIME TO CONVERT TO THE METRIC SYSTEM PASSED BEFORE I WAS BORN. GET WITH THE WORLD. AND YOU WONDER WHY MANY THINK AMERICA IS BACKWARDS. 

FROM THIS POINT FORWARD, I WILL REFER TO FAHRENHEIT AS THE STUPID SCALE.

Few in Hays battled an eyelash at it being that cold. It’s winter. It’s Kansas.

I found it to be quite nice this morning. There wasn’t much wind, and it was not too bad for me only in a sweatshirt and turtleneck underneath in the minus teens Celsius. As long as I had my head covered, I was just fine. The wind makes it brutal when it blows, but it wasn’t blowing much today.

Had the high in Baton Rouge been the high in Hays today, many in these parts would have put on shorts. Most would have gone out in short sleeves without a jacket.

Yet in Baton Rouge, they were bundled up more than they were here.

On January 12, 2017, the high in Baton Rouge was a ridiculous 27 Celsius (82 on the stupid scale).

One of my high school classmates, Steve Caparotta, is a meteorologist for the CBS affiliate in Baton Rouge. On his Facebook page, he asked whether those in “Red Stick” preferred hot or cold.

Most said they liked it hot.

What is wrong with those people? Do they not realize it is WINTER, even if it is at a subtropical latitude?

To me, any winter temperature above 7 Celsius (45 on the stupid scale) is too hot. And don’t get me started on it being that ridiculously hot in January.

Those who like it so hot in January need to move to Rio de Janeiro or other equatorial climates. That way they can have it hot and humid for 12 months a year.

I don’t know how ANYONE likes living in hot and humid weather 12 months a year. I wouldn’t last 12 minutes in Brazil. Or any other climate between the Tropic of Cancer and Tropic of Capricorn.

I hate hot weather. I really hate it. I despise going outside in the summer when it’s so hot you can fry eggs on the sidewalk. In western Kansas, it’s really bad when the wind starts blowing. You might as well stick your head inside an oven.

Do these people who love the heat not realize you can layer up in the cold, but in the heat, you can’t strip down to your birthday suit? I lived in the damn heat and humidity of Louisiana for 29 years. It’s one of the many, many, many things about the Bayou State I do not miss one bit, and the main reason I would never, EVER consider moving back.

To me, Kansas is way too hot as it is. The only reason I would not live in Alaska is because it’s isolated, but if I had my druthers, here are the states I would most like to live in:

  1. Maine
  2. North Dakota
  3. Wyoming
  4. South Dakota
  5. New Hampshire
  6. Vermont (I don’t care if Bernie Sanders is a Senator)

My least favorite:

  1. Florida (if you couldn’t have guessed that, you don’t know me)
  2. Arizona (I love you, Raymie, but it would take a heck of a lot for me to live there)
  3. Louisiana (how did I live there for so long? And I will never forgive my dad for marrying a New Orleans native)
  4. Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia, Tennessee, South Carolina, North Carolina all tied
  5. Arkansas EXCEPT the northwest corner
  6. Texas EXCEPT the panhandle

I feel very, very, VERY sorry for those who are going to be living long after I pass away. They’re going to have to deal with the severe consequences of global warming. It’s bad enough now. I can’t imagine what it will be like at the beginning of the 22nd century.

I cower in fear for the summers in Kansas. I’m seriously considering adopting a new sleep/wake pattern for days when I don’t have anything going, and that’s to sleep during the day and not do anything until after sunset. That would have to be altered on days I have appointments and want to do things out of town, but maybe it’s worth looking into.

At least I have two, maybe three, months of good weather still ahead. Then there’s tornado season, then the summer. Kansas sucks.

About David

I am a sportswriter for a group of weekly newspapers in small towns across northern Kansas. I grew up in New Orleans, went to college at LSU and wandered in the wilderness until Hurricane Katrina finally put me on the path to my current job.

Posted on January 12, 2018, in Weather and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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